Author, Musician, Engineer, Lover


Minor Incidents of Gaslighting that we Experience Every Day, and Even Encourage

Gaslighting is more than just a simple lie. I first heard about gaslighting when a friend of mine pointed out to me that I was a victim of this gross form of psychological abuse. Some people understand it to be one person trying to convince another person that they’re crazy by simply saying “you’re crazy, you need therapy”. But it is NOT that. Gaslighting is a spooky sort of emotional/psychological Read More

What is “normal” psychology?

I am currently Pondering the Definition of “Normal” psychology. What really is “normal”? I suppose psychologists define normal using some kind of survey… maybe they use a collection of brains… then define “normal” to be how a majority of brains would react to a given stimulus. But I have also been pondering how it is that we all go through life with internal struggles… and nobody can really truly know Read More

Unraveling the Title of My Book

As a musician, I’m often about “phonetics” in my writing. The words I choose to write are often chosen to convey a certain prosaic musical rhythm. So I’ll come right out and say that, phonetically, I’m not terribly in love with the title of my book “How To Sacrifice Your Lover – A Tale of Gaslighting and the Cult of Borderline Personality“ But the what title of the book does Read More

What does it really mean to be “crazy”?

Being the toxically introspective person I can often be, I have been recently pondering the definition of the term “crazy” in an effort to more succinctly summarize the concepts contained within this book I finished last year. If we are asked to imagine a “crazy person” in our head, most of us would imagine a psychopath… violent maybe… murderous…. angry… confused… ugly, outside and in. But… this definition of “crazy”… Read More

where is lover’s anonymous?

I’ve posted about “impulse” before. but I want to speak of it in a different way. To quote my own book, [sic] “We’re all human. We all sometimes fall victim to our compulsions and impulses. I try to be forgiving of the impulsive behavior of others, because I often fall victim to my own.” But in recent days, as I reconnected with someone I lost last year, after smashing our Read More

Two People, Who Don’t Dance, Dancing

This is diary entry of sorts, building upon events from the epilogue of my book. It’s been an “interesting” week, if not “good”… culminating in a tornado of “bizarre”. Disclaimer: since alcohol is a huge contributing factor to this story, I would not trust the accuracy of the statements and events within… and I would not take the actions of either parties seriously… … but I woke up this morning Read More

Saying Goodbye to the Goths and Toxic Vanity

6 weeks ago, I paid my final visit to Minneapolis’s, legendary, infamous, goth club, “Ground Zero“. I was one of the club’s most devoted regulars for many years leading up to this point, but my nights there had become increasingly negative. There were many nights that I could look around the room and find only one person that I actually liked in the entire place, and just one decent person, Read More

Scorched Earth

My book is called “How to Sacrifice Your Lover”. And I need to stress right out of the gate that this book is not an attack on people who suffer from Borderline Personality as the subtitle would suggest. On the contrary, this is a book that was borne entirely of love. It is a chronicle of love, of endless love… of endless sacrificial love. My best friend of 10 years Read More

Enlightening Psychology Today Article Helps Explain Why My Book Exists

A quote from a Psychology Today article that I found meaningful: “[A ‘split’ person] while intellectually knowing that the other is acting out in an unacceptable, and sometimes dangerous, manner begins to doubt their own sanity. This is because the person being split begins to mirror the traits and behaviors of the borderline character s/he is experiencing in reaction to, and sometimes in an effort to manage, the behavior with Read More

Is “Gone Girl” a Borderline Personality?

*** SPOILER ALERT*** This article contains spoilers. I recently watched the movie “Gone Girl”. I have yet to read the novel, but it is high on my list. Is “Gone Girl” a story about a Borderline Personality? Principally, no… Principally, “Gone Girl”, is a manifestation of anti-social personality disorder. “Amazing Amy” is a psychopathic person, but we see three versions of Nick and Amy in this story. And you could Read More